Nothing There (written 7/29)

I am in a place unlike any I have been in before. I don't like it. It is a terrible place that feels like it is changing me. I liked myself too. It is weird to think that something that can happen in an instant can change so profoundly how one functions on a day to day basis.

I have sometimes believed that I tend to be too trusting rather than not trusting enough. Perhaps this stems from my intense value placed in honesty. Since I strive to be honest at all times I tend to assume others do as well. This opinion can be changed for a person of course, should they be someone I find lying frequently or something.

Point is, this level of trust I tend to give people who might not deserve it generally doesn't blow up in my face. However, it takes a pretty amazing amount of trust to give someone your heart. I mean really give it to them. I fear I may not find myself able to trust people like I once did, at least not so easily.